07. The Briefcase

Bugs the size of baseballs! And me without a can of Raid. Damn that woman and her big mouth for sendin’ me out here with these fuckin’ monsters. “Ow!” I groaned and swatted another mosquito off my neck. “Seriously I thought these thangs hated the cold. Why the fuck they still buzzin’ ‘round?”

“I think there’s a small lake up near back here. They’d stay for a while to breed,” Zach answered as he led the way up the dirt path.

“Or maybe they just like your sweet, supple skin,” Knox joked and flicked my ear with the tip of his finger. “It might be your natural juices and berries!” I knocked him away with a shot to the ribs and he laughed as I had to now scratch the spot he touched. “How much further you think we should go?”

“I don’t know but I wanted to get some wood for later tonight anyway. We shouldn’t have the women doing that kind of thing,” Zach muttered and stopped just at the fork near a large boulder.

“You’re just sweet on that Abby chick,” Knox teased. “You’d better be careful with her. I hear she’s never made it and her cooch has grown spider webs on it.” I felt myself cringe hearin’ him speak about any woman like that. And to make matters worse he elbow jabbed me and smiled as if I was supposed to join in or somethin’.

“Cool it with that Knox,” I growled thinkin’ ‘bout Evian again. “Even if you don’t like her ain’t no need to be disrespecting his female.”

“Ah come on I was just teasing. Lighten up Bro.” I heard the bushes rustle beside us and quickly brought my crowbar up fixin’ to tag whatever was out there.

“Shh,” Zach motioned towards us as he crept into the bush. I took a step back and Knox moved ahead of me. Man this is some messed up shit. Who walks into sounds bein’ made behind a bush? You wait for that shit to pop out and then cold cock it as hard as fuckin’ possible. But I held still like Zach said, waitin’. One thang was for sure though, it wasn’t gonna be me up in that damn bush.

Knox flinched and then I heard it too. It started off as a low growl that got louder the more Zach moved. I took another step back. Whatever that shit was it didn’t sound too happy havin’ us in its space and I was all too happy to leave it the fuck alone. “What the fuck are you doin’? Dude that shit is growlin’ at yo ass Man, back the fuck off before it bite you.”

Then there was a hiss and the next thang I know a large, furry creature came popping up at Zach’s face. He ducked and the shit got Knox who ran around like a little bitch screamin’ ‘Get it off’. I about died as I took off up the path watchin’ Zach smack at that thang. Turns out it was just a raccoon. I hurriedly pulled out my cell phone and hit the record button, movin’ back another step to make sure I got it all. Crazy ass white folks. That’s why you don’t move towards the sounds. “Yo if yall done playin’ grab ass, maybe we can get back to the girls.”

The idea of leavin’ Chazz’s dumbass back to watch over them didn’t sit too well with me. I mean what’s dude gonna do if some shit pops off? Smoke ‘em to death? “You two can go on back. I still need to get some more wood for later on.”

“Naw, let’s get the wood and get back. At least we’ll have somethin’ to show for this shit.” I laughed again as I passed Knox who was gettin’ the leftover fur off of his shirt and out of his mouth.

We got back to the camp later that afternoon. The girls were all worried and Evian ran up to me, throwin’ her arms around my neck. I can’t tell you how good it feels knowin’ someone cares that much about you. I leaned forward and gave her a quick kiss, watchin’ as she wiggled her ass at me and smiled. “Keep it up and see what happens,” I warned with a smile. She gave me that sexy laugh of  hers when she’s tryin’ to tease me and pulled me off towards the pit where everybody had gathered.

“Everything’s alright?” Evian asked, takin’ a seat in my lap.

“Yeah Baby it wasn’t nothin’ but a raccoon. But you shoulda seen the look on Knox’s face when we found it. Dude had ass and fur flyin’ all up around here screamin’ ‘It burns, it burns! Get it off’.” I pushed her up a second and pulled my phone out my back pocket. “Watch this.”

“You recorded it?” Knox asked, suddenly feelin’ like the smallest dick in the locker room.

“Hell yeah I recorded it! This shit is goin’ on YouTube.” I pushed the play button and Jemma, Abby and Chazz came around behind my girl watchin’ Zach and Knox’s epic battle. I laughed lookin’ at the expression on his face and hearin’ him screamin’ again.

“Aww Knoxxy,” Jemma purred and pressed herself against his chest. “That was very brave of you.” She couldn’t hide the smile on her face as she consoled him but I can’t blame her.

“Alright so again we’re at a loss for service around the woods and it’s already a little after five so I don’t think taking off now to look for someone is gonna be the smartest thing. Chazz you can take first watch and I’ll relieve you after three hours then Roland, then Knox.”

“Wait how come I always get first watch?”

“Because you sleep like a fuckin’ truck and once ya ass is out there’s no wakin’ you again. You take first and we ain’t gotta worry ‘bout you afterwards,” I explained as Chazz pulled a cigarette from his pocket and dropped onto the log beside Jemma.

“Alright I can live with that.”

Abby opened the cooler behind her and pulled out a pack of hotdogs as Evian passed out plates and drinks. “Wait a second hold up, I thought we had burgers and stuff in there too.”

“Uh yes,” she responded. “There are hotdogs, burgers, sausages, steaks and some breakfast foods.”

“Alright then why don’t we pop some of them on the grill then?” I asked and pulled the meat out. Abby shrugged and placed the hotdogs back in the cooler and everyone followed me over to the picnic area as I started up the coals.

It had only been four days but I was already tired of hotdogs every damn night. It was like they were tryin’ to get rid of them first but I mean if we got steak, why not have a steak? Hamburgers would be fine for me tonight though. Once the coals were hot enough, I popped a few patties on the grill and watched them sizzle and brown. “Chef don’t take no special orders so don’t even go there. I don’t know how yall like them and I don’t care, these thangs are gettin’ burnt and dead.”

I remarked stoppin’ Chazz in his steps as he was comin’ to tell me not to burn his too much. I wasn’t really gonna burn them but I sure as hell wasn’t about to bite into one only to have it bleed in my mouth. Once the burgers finished we all sat around with a few beers finishing up dinner. It didn’t take much longer before it was pitch black dark out at which point Knox got that stupid ass look in his face again.

“It’s time for another creepy tale boys and ghouls.” He did his best to sound like Vincent Price or some shit but only resulted in us laughing our asses off again at him. “Who should it be? Hmm…” He started pointin’ his finger around the group like that Duck-Duck children’s game until he got to me.

“Oh hell no,” I shook my head negatively. “What makes you think I even know any scary stories?”

“Uh because you’re my roomie and best bud. Come on Ro don’t be such a buzz kill. Everyone’s gonna have their chance but tonight it’s all about you Big Man. Show us what you got!”

My eyebrow rose in Evian’s direction as I felt her pushin’ me into it. I sighed and got up from my seat, movin’ towards the front of the group. Man this is some bullshit. Got us black folks out in the middle of some creepy ass woods tellin’ creepy ass ghost stories right before we go to sleep. Whoever invented this as some ‘fun’ pastime was seriously out they fuckin’ minds. I don’t know ghost stories, who reads those thangs? So I closed my eyes and tried to think of somethin’ to really scare the piss outta everyone. I got it! “Alright yall, sit back and get ready to get scared.”

“No, no, no you have got to be kidding me!” Janet growled watching as the air quickly escaped her front right tire. She’d just finished grabbing the last party favors for her daughter’s sixteenth birthday blowout and was trying to hurry home. She was already running late and she knew the guests would be arriving at any time now. “Great, just perfect.” Pulling out her cell phone Janet punched in the number for AAA and waited for them to get someone out to her location. 

“We’re running a little behind with the storms and everything. It’s a bad season for driving I guess. The earliest one of our guys will be available is in 45 minutes to an hour.”

“Are you serious? There’s nothing in the area that can be here sooner?”

“I’m sorry Ma’am but we’re dealing with the crash on the 10 as well as a few minor bumps and some out of gas drivers near downtown. I will make sure we get someone out to you as soon as one becomes available.”

“Fine. I guess I’ll wait then; not like I have much choice in the matter.” Janet thanked the operator and hung up the phone. Piling her bags into the backseat, she leaned against the driver side door and waited.

“Excuse me Miss?” She turned to find a well dressed young man walking towards her. He was wearing a nice pin-striped suit, polished wing tip shoes and carrying a black leather briefcase. His eyes were crystal blue and smiling the closer he got. “I don’t mean to bother you Ma’am but my car broke down just around the corner and I’m running late for a meeting. I was wondering if it would be at all possible to maybe catch a ride with you?”

He seemed genuine enough and was very polite. Janet glanced in the direction he pointed and noticed smoke pouring out of the hood of a red sedan parked near the bus stop and frowned. She guessed that operator was right this is a bad season for driving. “I’m sorry to hear about your car trouble but you and I are in the same boat right now. I have a flat tire unfortunately so I won’t be able to give you a ride.”

He looked down and saw the flat and nodded his head. “I see. Well if you’d like I could get that changed for you and then maybe we could both get out of here before the storm hits?”

“That’s very sweet of you to offer but I’ve already called Triple A. Someone should be here soon to help.” Truth be told she’d have LOVED for this young man to fix her tire so she could be gone. But dressed the way he was, she didn’t want to see him ruin his suit before his meeting.

“They can be rather slow. And this is their busiest time of the year. I could get this changed in about five minutes and have you on the road again in no time. What do you say?”

Janet eyed his attire once more and the care he took in his appearance and shook her head. “I don’t know…” 

“It’s really no trouble at all. I’ll be very careful not to get any dirt on my suit, if you don’t mind me sitting my coat in your backseat?” Fine, she was finally convinced and gave him a smile in consent. “Great! I’ll get you up and running in a jiffy.”

Removing his coat and tie, he placed the items in the backseat of her car with his briefcase and got to work changing the tire. Janet watched him, making sure he was as careful as possible not to stain his shirt and pants. He went about the work seamlessly as if he’d done it a hundred times over. She also kept watch of the time. Her daughter was probably going crazy thinking she’d abandoned her on the day she needed her the most.

“There, all done,” he sang as he lowered the tire jack and placed the items back inside her trunk along with the busted tire. “If you don’t mind I’m gonna run inside really quick to the restroom and clean some of this dirt from my hands.” 

Janet again nodded her head, checking the time on her cell phone as he hurried off towards the store. She paced the area near her door for a moment and the jingling of her ringtone startled her as it buzzed in her pocket. “Hello?”

“Mom where are you? Everyone is already here and waiting!” It was her daughter Jenny and she seemed highly agitated. Janet explained to her what happened and that she’d be along shortly. It seemed as if the young man was gone for quite some time and she simply didn’t have much more to spare. 

Hopping behind the wheel, she pulled off from the shopping mall parking lot and started home. The party went off without much more of a hitch. Jenny as well as all of her friends seemed to really enjoy themselves and it was a pleasure knowing she could put that smile on her face. Once everyone had left, she got to work with the cleanup and her husband Dennis came in from the grill to help.

“I almost thought you’d planned to leave me alone with a houseful of teen girls.” He joked as he collected the trash from the kitchen table.

“No, actually I had a flat tire and was waiting on Triple A. Luckily for me though a nice young man came along to help. He got the spare tire on and I made it home.” 

“Really?” she smiled to herself hearing the tone in her husband’s voice as he asked that question. He considered himself a macho man and HATED when another guy would come in to fix something he could take care of himself. Needless to say if the pipes burst or the electricity is on the brink, her home is in a blackout without the use of a shower for months while her macho man repairs it. It came as no surprise to her when Dennis insisted on going outside to check over the young man’s work.

She watched from the kitchen window as he knelt down to examine the tire, kicking it, walking around the car ensuring it was the same height as the others. He stopped briefly at the backdoor and she saw him pull something from the backseat. Oh no, she thought as she remembered that man had placed his belongings in her car as he fixed the tire. He was going to look pretty silly walking into a meeting without his jacket and briefcase.

“Honey I think he left something behind,” Dennis called to me. Janet dried her hands on the wash cloth and moved towards the table beside him.

“Well maybe there’s a name or phone number inside he can be reached.” She felt awful taking off without so much as a word and then stealing his things too after he’d gone out of his way to help.

Dennis opened the case and Janet took a step back in shock at what they found. Inside the nice leather briefcase were four items: chloroform, a rag, a roll of duct tape and a knife which was probably the cause of the flat in the first place. She looked at her husband in horror as the sudden realization of what just happened rushed through her. That nicely dressed young man must have been the I-10 Slasher and had she given him a ride, she would never have seen her family again!

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